The United States Congress has become a clown shit show, that got hit by a shit-flinging tornado—and that’s putting it nicely.
It seems that not a single day goes by now where some elected House Representative or Senator isn’t embroiled in some sort of drama or ridiculous antics. From such classic hits like Rep. Santos fabricating his entire history and then gaslighting Americans, to bleach-blonde, bad-built, butch-body sentient swamp muck Marjorie Taylor Greene, to squashing bipartisan bills bullshittery for Mr. Moldy Orange, to outright lying to Americans on a fictional weak economy for political fear points, to lambasting the U.S. Judicial system, to the insane backing of the Project 2025 agenda, the U.S. Congress as a whole has become the equivalent of a sewage treatment facility that isn’t operating—or in other words: stagnant shit-water.
Long gone are the days of fiscal responsibility conservatives and robust social programs democrats and liberals coming together to actually do something—anything—for the good of the United States and her people.
In 2023, the U.S. Congress passed a whopping, insanely yuuuuuuge number of bills..checks notes..oh wait, it was actually just 27. There were over 700 votes held that year, making the percentage of votes that actually passed bills into law a paltry 3.86%; and still sitting on the desk of the U.S. Congress are 15,677 more outstanding bills and resolutions.
At this current rate, it would take 580.63 years to clear the backlog.
The Partisan Hack Graveyard
In 2019, if you can remember that far back, Mitch McConnell was gleeful—dubbing himself the ‘grim reaper’—and openly relished in his intent to stonewall, block, and bury pretty much anything with a democrat’s name on it.
Hurr, hurr, hurrrrr, Mitch, that’s hilarious! — you fucking idiot.
Now let’s be clear: I’m in no way advocating that opposing parties capitulate to everything in the name of bipartisanship or teamwork or whatever; the world simply isn’t all puppies and rainbows. And in truth, we absolutely need multiple, different sane view points to cooperate together to arrive at sound and inclusive legislation.
But openly admitting that you simply will not do your job because the opposition is across some imaginary canyon of ‘us vs. them’ is an irresponsible way to run a country’s government.
Likewise, on the other side of this fictional canyon, immature elected officials like Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Senator Bernie Sanders swing for the fences on imagination-land style bills that stand minuscule chances of becoming law—and then complain and whine loudly about how “the opposition just won’t cooperate with us!”
Is there really any wonder why nothing ever gets done?
Of course not, because naturally, this dynamic leads to the partisan deadlock bullshit that abounds in the U.S. Congress, and all the while, major issues plaguing this nation—our nation—go unaddressed, like festering boils of some partisan disease we just can’t seem to shake.
This ‘us vs. them’ style partisanship is so prevailing that it even infects the inner workings of both sides. From internal disputes and power struggles, to warring factions of breakaways, to a single person outright holding an entire party’s agenda hostage.
The U.S. Congress is no longer a shining beacon of freedom and democracy at work; it has become a partisan hack graveyard of long withered bills; a playground for petulant, fully-grown children only playing Government; bought and paid for by lobbying and special interest groups, and subsidized by your tax dollars.
Time to Grow the Fuck Up
Here’s a novel idea: how about the members of the U.S. Congress grow the fuck up and quit acting like someone takes a shit in their cereal bowl every morning.
I’d be willing to wager that 90% of you so-called elected “leaders” don’t behave like petulant fucking children in every aspect of your lives—or do you? Perhaps you all really are just entitled, power-thirsty sluts that are so threatened by progress and equality that you kick and scream and throw a tantrum at every turn.
At what point did you forget that your oaths are to this country, and not a political party or demagogue?
At what point do you stop and realize that you are the fucking problem?
Today, the United States is no longer a world leader on many fronts: we are ranked 13th globally in education, we stopped being the country with the world’s best Human Development Index rating back in 1994, we rank the worst on gun homicides per capita among rich and developed nations (seriously, you need to chill Virgin Islands), and an alarming 78% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck.
You know who’s to blame for all these problems?
The United States Congress is.
The idiots you elect to supposedly run this nation are instead hyper-focused on chasing clout and extreme ideologies, and less focused on working for your interests—or even the country’s interests for that matter. They’re so desperately thirsty for their version of Americana that they’ll throw your well-being under the bus just to keep it within their grasp.
So, to the members of the U.S. Congress: It’s time to stop. It’s time to stop being low-grade human trash. It’s time for you to do your jobs. It’s time to address the issues facing this nation in a constructive manner. It’s time to grow a fucking backbone and stand for respect, decency, democracy; to stand for collaboration instead of disenfranchisement; it’s time to stand for the American people—all of them.
Because you know truth, even if your constituents do not: If any group of people deserves credit for destroying this nation, surely it is the group of people in charge of it; and should this nation ever falter and crumble, I certainly know where I’ll be pointing my finger.
